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Earlier today I was feeling guilty for not doing any work/procrastinating as usual so I messaged a bunch of law school friends on Gmail with “I refuse to do work. What are you up to?” and these are the responses I received:

Nicole: Omg listen. On day one of classes, I laid in bed for an hour convincing myself to go to class and thinking up excuses for why I could miss. Two weeks later I’m doing the same thing, and I still haven’t made it to a day of Evidence. I’m not even on the seating chart for that class.

Lauren: I’m in class online shopping for an anniversary gift. I was looking at lingerie before, but things got creepy with the kid sitting behind me.

Matt: I sat down to finish up that reflection journal we have to do, but then my roommates put on Beerfest so that was a problem.

Becca: Negotiating the terms of a threesome with a hot married couple. They propositioned me a few weeks ago at an art show, and at first I said no, but now I’m totally into it. Bucket list and all that.

Chris: I’m drunk.

Thank God I’m friends with these people.