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I love hugs. I like the kind where my arms go under yours and I get to squeeeeeze really tight. I like hugs hello, and hugs goodbye. I can list in my mind the friends in my life who are the best at hugging.

It’s hard to convince a person not to go to law school. No matter what explanation, or factors, or research you throw at them, they always think that they’ll be different. They always think that you just weren’t right for law school and that you’re projecting onto them. Well I think I’ve found the decisive factor: if you like hugs, DON’T GO TO LAW SCHOOL. The end.

NASA staffperson hug


Pictured: A smorgasbord of failure. Also? I spelled smorgasbord right on my first try!

Law school has an abundance of people, a very large percentage of people as compared to people in general, who hate being touched, and specifically hugs. I have one friend, Leila, who only lets me hug her once a year – on her birthday.

Graduation hugs


Me: OMG only 364 days until I get another! Her: Just smile til it’s over.

I’m really not sure why this is, but it’s totally true. I’ve had friends here tell me that they hate snuggling (snuggling!) even the sound of the word is delightful. Someone once told me that they especially hate touching after sex.

Facebook Spooning Page (See, it even has it’s own FB page.)

I totally love sweating and grunting while haphazardly squashing my genitalia against yours, but this is fucking gross.

I don’t really have any enlightened commentary about this observation. It just saddens me. I have had to accept so many limp, ass-out, awkward patting-on-back, sub-par hugs since entering law school because apparently lawyers just aren’t huggers. I’d start a movement or something, but I’m kind of lazy, so why doesn’t everyone just start hugging whoever they see on campus? At your summer job already? That’s okay, hug your boss! See me walking alone later? Just hug me. I probably need it *and* you’ll make my day. If you don’t know who I am just assume I’m that student walking alone over there, and go give me a hug!